How Well Do You Receive Feedback? 

Last week we talked about giving feedback so it is received. But what happens when you’re the one receiving the feedback?

The other side of the desk might not be as comfortable. Receiving feedback and absorbing it to improve yourself takes humility and an open mind. Taking a step out and being honest with yourself isn’t always easy. If you have good rapport with the person who is sharing with you, it’s much easier. But that is not always the case. If you actually asked for the feedback, be ready for anything! 

Your responses in situations like these can define your personal brand in a good or bad way–you decide. 

Small changes can make a big impact—start with these tips to put yourself in a good headspace before your next review or debrief session where your performance might be discussed. 

Don’t Be Defensive 

The reason for the feedback really is to improve you, your approach your attitude, the situation, or the role you play. If you agree things can improve, be open to new ideas and the opportunity to hear how things were perceived compared to your intentions. 

Take it all in before you respond and start correcting the details of the situation. A good supervisor will allow you to respond and discuss things after they have spoken. 

Be relaxed. Loosen your shoulders. Maintain an open body position showing you are open to receive the comments. Don’t argue, but you can clarify what the person is saying. If you asked for feedback, you might be listening to the people you supervise, or people not in your department. If what they are saying is really irking you, just nod slowly and say, “Thank you, I will give that some thought.” Lashing back at them is not the route to success even if you think it is. Deflection is a really bad look. 

Really Listen

Sometimes we are misperceived or wrongly accused. Listen for cues that this might be the case while remaining cool. If it will help you to keep track of the message by taking notes, so ask if that’s okay. Ask questions to make sure you understand. If they are not offering examples, ask for specifics. 

Then, find out how the person addressing you feels these issues can be improved. Look for solutions. It will show how much you care. 

Ask a Trusted Friend

What feedback does is holds up a mirror, and sometimes we are surprised that there are blemishes we hadn’t noticed. Think about what is said. Sometimes the word choice is poor, but the critique is spot-on. Confide in a friend or partner and share what the feedback is to see if they can see some truth in it. Prepare yourself for their agreement. Feedback first makes us aware of the issues that we can improve. If we invest in the change, it may lead to many happy results. 

You might talk to more than one person if the feedback just sounds wrong. But be realistic, your mom, for example, might be biased and never think you need to improve. If you are willing to take an objective look at yourself, you’ll know whether you have some work to do, or if the person giving you feedback is an outlier. 

Corrections Needed Or Else … 

Find out if this is holding you back. Maybe you’ve been passed over for a position or a raise because of something you weren’t even aware of. It is far better to keep the lines of communication open so that you are learning, growing, improving all the time, not just after review time. Be Open and Willing to ImproveWe can always be better and do better. We learn through our experiences, so appreciate the feedback as a chance for you to take inventory of your skills and abilities. 

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Leslie A.M. Smith is the owner of McCormick L.A. Public Relations, a PR consultancy she founded in 1994. She is the author of Laws of Promotion and the Co-Author of Microenterprise Hits the Big Screen. She teaches a marketing starter class online for small businesses called BOOST, that teaches the essentials at the basis of all promotions.